How often do you make assumptions?

An assumption is something we assume to be true or certain to happen without proof.

Jon ignored Jen most of the day.  Jen assumed he was angry with her.  Could her assumption be wrong?  Could there be another reason Jon didn’t talk to her?

Since Jen assumed her thoughts to be true, she responded back to him with resentment, distance and angry feelings.  This caused Jon to make assumptions about Jen and he also pulled away from her.

This vicious circle leads to an escalation of problems and distance in relationships.

It turns out that Jon had a serious argument with his wife that morning and was feeling extremely anxious and agitated about his whole personal situation.  It had nothing to do with Jen.

Problems occur when you assign a deliberate negative intent to someone’s behavior.

Next time, check it out.

Jen could have said, “You seem upset, Jon–did I do something to offend you?” Maybe Jen would have given Jon the opportunity to open up and help his day go better.  or “You seem upset, is there anything I can do to help?” Jon would have felt like someone cared.

You know the old saying: When you assume you make an ass out of u and me (ass u me)