Students need to know that threats against someone’s life have to be taken seriously; that using the words “die” or “kill” is not a joking matter.

I’ve seen kids in face to face interactions make the verbal statement, “I’m going to kill you.” But, I could also tell by their non-verbal behavior; the tone of their voice, their facial expression, their posture, that they were just kidding and it wasn’t a serious threat to someone’s life.

When someone makes this threat online, it’s a different story. It could be real or maybe not…

Six girls were arrested, in January 2011, for their connection with a Facebook invitation to take part in “Attack a Teacher Day” at two schools in Nevada. Students responded to the invite with online threats against specific teachers.Although the six students insisted it was a joke, there was no way to be sure that the 100 students who accepted the invitation wouldn’t take it seriously.

This becomes even more frightening and serious after the recent, January 5, 2011, school shooting in Omaha, Nebraska, where a 17 year old shot the assistant principal and principal before taking his own life.

School violence does happen! Threats cannot be taken lightly!

Many online comments have been protected by the 1st amendment, freedom of speech, but true threats are not protected under the constitution.

We need to use these incidences as teachable moments for our kids about responsible online behavior.

Last night I watched an episode of “Law and Order” and there was a case where a lady was being harassed; she ended up jumping off the Manhattan Bridge. Initially, all witnesses denied that they had seen anything happen.

Eventually, one witness confessed that a man had dragged the lady out of her car and was abusing her; it turns out there were several that witnessed this, but not one of them had done anything to help her. They were too scared to get involved.

This is called “social proof”. When people aren’t sure what to do, they look to others for guidance. If no one else is doing anything, then they don t either. People assume that other people understand more about the situation than they do, and they follow their lead.

Unfortunately, this passive response from bystanders is not unusual. In other words, bystanders are living up to their name by standing there and doing nothing – and this is a problem. A number of experts today say that bystanders have the power to drastically reduce bullying at schools.

Cyberbullying takes place where adults aren’t present and the kids who are witnessing the cyberbullying need to be empowered to stand up for each other. Minding your own business doesn’t solve the problem of bullying.

Most people want to do something to help someone who is being bullied but often they don’t know what to do. Just like in face to face bullying, cyberbullies like an audience. If the audience shows disapproval, cyberbullies are more likely to be discouraged from continuing.

Peer acceptance is important to them.

It’s important that we teach kids about the power of the bystander early, so they know what to do when they find themselves in that situation.

Sara was fuming at Nikki, so angry that she didn’t even care about sharing Nikki’s secrets on Facebook. Thinking about the consequences after she pressed the “send” key was the last thing on her mind!

The next day in school, everyone seemed to know; it was unreal how fast the rumors were flying and the stories were spreading. It didn’t take long for Nikki to hear the stories and find out how they had gotten started.

Nikki felt hurt, betrayed and humiliated!

Everyone seemed to be talking about her and adding untrue details to her life story. It felt like everywhere she went, people were making fun of her.

Sara felt guilty and embarrassed about what she’d done and wished she could take it back. She couldn’t believe how fast the stories were spreading. Even students in neighboring towns were talking about Nikki.

She wanted to undo the damage, but it was too late; hundreds had already read the online posts.

Technology makes it so easy to express strong emotional impulses. Back in the day, before technology became a social life line, Sara might have taken the time to reflect on her feelings and calm down before doing something rash.

Information posted online is routed to hundreds or thousands in a matter of minutes or even seconds. What you post online one time may not seem that bad, but when it is sent on repeatedly, the damages can be even more than you’d imagine.

Once the message is sent, the sender loses all control. People can copy and paste the information, and add their own information to it. You never know what it will end up saying or who will end up seeing it.

Even good friends can inadvertently hurt each other!